Ugly world

Hello world.

It seems as if as the day comes closer to leaving i am not sure its what i really want. It feels as if i should have just saved the thousands and go for a getaway or something. I feel out of place and nothing anyone says can make me feel better. Not that anyone said anything to me. Could it be that i made the decision too early without realising what i've placed myself into?

I will stick to it anyway. Not much of a choice.

It used to be that i do not know what to do. But i'm pretty sure right now i know what i want to do. I know what i didnt like, and i am going to change that.

I realised one more thing today. Not only did i hate secondary school, i also hated ELDDS. I hated most of my teachers. I hate all student organisations. They all represent the same thing. BS. Fucking pretense. I dont know why i was so dumb as to succumb to the four years of shitty-environment. I should have been vocal and piss everyone that i could.

I realised that i hate surprises. I love them because of the intentions. But i hate the surprise itself.

I really like being by myself. I actually do. SOmetimes it gets depressing. But atleast i do not need people around me to be comfortable. People always say things about me like i'm anti-social. I'm not. I just hate mixing around with typical-typicals and i feel better when there's less crowd. I dont happen to fit in with the "norms" because i'm like that. Then so what? You call me "weird" and "loner" and "crazy" only because i don't do the same things you do. But in actual fact i make more sense than you do. You just dont pay attention.

I hate the fact that the world gets uglier every second.

I hate people who don't care about the right things. I hate people who are morally handicapped, not because of their upbringing but out of choice.

I hate not having much choices.